It's not language that helps you to understand...
it's understanding.
Understanding is a concept that goes beyond language.
You can converse in the same mother tongue, but you never understand each other.
You can both converse in a second language, yet you can understand each other perfectly.

Those sweet gazes and stares,
those shy smiles,
those frequent nods and giggles,
but I know in our minds, we understand each other.

With some people, even though you're using the same mother tongue, you just don't understand.
Because our minds are not the same.
It's not even about similarities.
Some people can be so similar, yet so distant.
Some people can be so different, yet so close.
Some people have the right amount of understanding, words aren't needed anymore.

Understanding is what bonds people together.
Because how can you bond with someone you can't understand?
It's not about merely accepting.
Understanding involves a lot of process beyond accepting.
And if you can't understand everyone, it's completely fine.
No one can understand everyone, and it's okay.

Some people are more understanding than most.
Most people pretend they understand when they're not.
You can tell who are the genuine ones, and be grateful for them.
Everyone can be understood by someone.
Including you!

No matter how weird or awkward you think you are.
No matter how you feel like an outsider.
Someone understands you. Someone who really does.
And the deal is, you don't even have to try to make everyone understand!
When they understand, they just do.
No matter how complicated you think you are.
No matter how you feel like the odd one out.

So, do you understand me? Because I understand you.

Labels: poem, poetry, understand, understanding, universal

Gentle, elegant, graceful.
Long, soft brown mane, fluttered by the breath of nature.
Milky skin brighter than pearls.
A white carnation peeking out on top of her left ear.

Long, ivory dress she wears.
Gliding lightly on a garden of flowers.
Soft, pink tints creep up her cheeks.
And an earnest smile escapes her lips.

She's a princess all princes want to make a queen of.
She's everyone's dreams come true.
She's a definition of beauty.

Everyone takes a pleasure from just a glimpse of her presence.
Everyone wants to be her, or to be hers.
Everyone starts to feel jealous.
Every time she walks past, every man drools.

She takes my hand,
People turn their heads towards me,
And they snicker.

I take a look at myself.
Short, messy red hair.
Tanned olive skin.
Even nature refuses to enhance my description.

Spectacles framing my face.
Boyish shirt and pants.
Honest, strong, reckless.
Even if we run on the same garden of flowers, we are not the same.

People look at me like I'm her handmaiden.
That elegant girl is my best friend.
My boyish self is her best friend.
But still, people look at me like I'm her handmaiden.

Even if we have the same abilities, we are not the same.

We are both grown women, but we are not the same.

Because she's the universal definition of beauty,
and I'm just me.

Labels: beautiful, beauty, feminism, friendship, people, poem, poetry, princess, sadness, womanhood

No dark clouds surrounding me,
just my red blanket enveloping my body.
The air feels clear and crisp,
but why am I suffocating?

The hammer plummeting inside my head reappears,
followed by the familiar little tingling steps of the spiders,
perhaps to me they're all just reminders,
of the one thing I've always wondered...

Am I sane or am I not?

The urges to scream,
yearning to feel the breaking bones in my hands,
the need to shout,
desperately wanting to create chaos...

Craving to feel alive again.

My thoughts are criminals.
They've been caged within the prison of morality.
Arsonists, rapists, murderers.
They are jailed in a prison deep in my mind.

They would stomp the ground,
dig with shovels,
destroy the cells,
to run away and be free.

The world is clear to my senses,
but not in my head.
My head is in a state of calamity.

Labels: anger, anxiety, depression, disturbed, emotion, ill, poem, poetry, psychology, sick

Those drips of burning alcohol,
I took it without hesitation.
Five, six, seven, then I lost count.
My system digests it too well.
I wanted to get drunk.
So it might just be easier for me to dream of you again.

I didn't.

I was vast asleep, only briefly.
No dreams.
No you.
I wanted to see you.
But I woke up in this ungodly hour,
As my playlist was finished.
No dreams.
No you.

I wanted to cry, but I couldn't.
But I can only hurt.
It's fucking 4:44 am.
No dreams.
No you.
Just the darkness enveloping myself.
No more alcohol to knock myself out again.
What am I supposed to do to see you again?

I changed positions hesitantly,
Counting endless numbers,
Listening to my lullaby, my ritual to fall asleep,
Yet, I could only see black.
No dreams.
No you.
I wanted to cry, but it wouldn't fall.
I felt like I would take the fall.
Just in case I could probably see you again.
Do I have to jump?
Do I have to hit the concrete pavement to feel your breath on my neck again?

Do you not want to see me again?
Because I'm drunk?
Because I took those shots of Smirnoff?
I did it for you.
I thought it might've been easier for me to fall into my dream.
Are you mad at me for doing so?
Do you not want to see me again?

I'm drunk.
But I couldn't see you, or any dreams at all.
I couldn't even fall back to sleep to save myself.
Why wouldn't you help me?
Do you not want to see me again?
Are you sick of me already?

In the darkness I lied still.
Listening to the lullaby all over again.
With a wish that maybe I could see you tonight.
Just maybe.
So that when I close my eyes, you would be there, reaching out for my hands and smile.
Like you always do.
And in that moment, we are invincible.

Labels: alcohol, broken, depression, dream, heartbreak, heartbroken, love, poem, poetry, sadness

Long hair, loves or has tattoos, and cooking ability.
I wanted a man like that, all my life.
I found him.
I didn't fall for him.

Everyone has their own preference.
I did.
I gave up on mine.
I didn't fall for him.

Now I can't imagine myself with anyone.
Any guy.
Any kind of person.
Who will I end up with?

Will I love him?
Will he love me back?
Will we spend the rest of our lives together?
Will I ever meet him?

In my dreams, I know who I want.
When I woke up, I don't want anyone.
I met someone in my dreams.
He was special.

Every minute of waking up felt like another world for me.
I spend my day wanting to go back to my dreams.
Because I know in my dreams, he's there.
Reaching out his hands for me.

I live my life in my dreams.
I dream more than I wake.
In the infinite world in my dreams, we're together.
We found each other.

I'm certain about my dreams.
Not so certain about my real world.
How long will I have to live this way?

Labels: broken, dream, dreams, heartbreak, heartbroken, him, love, poem, poetry, reality

My days are not gloomy,

Labels: happiness, lonely, love, poem, poetry, sadness

Love is unexplainable, yet everyone insists that it exists.
Love is untouchable, yet people say it is real.

I'm not talking about a mother's eternal love for her child,
I'm talking about the bond between two human beings as partners.

I don't know how it feels, as simple as that.
I need someone to appear in my life to show me that it is real.

Love makes you all giggly and happy, yet it tears your heart and soul apart at the same time.
...or so they say.

Why would anyone sacrifice themselves for such complex feelings?

Love is different from friendship.
...why do they differ?

Friendship is something that lasts forever, it's something beautiful.
It makes you all giggly and happy, yet it does not tear your heart and soul apart at the same time.

Why would people choose love over friendship?
Why aren't people in love with their friends?

Love is foreign for my logic.
And until the day someone can prove me otherwise, I still can't accept this.

With my logic, I'm a fool who can't understand love.
I'm no better than those fools in love.
I'm no less than those who understand love.

I have a brain that I know how to use properly,
I have a heart, yet I don't know how to utilise it.

I've been looking for someone to help me understand love.
I found none.
If you would help me, that would be much appreciated, my friend.

I know that once I understand love,
I will never let it go.

So teach me how to love,
and I will forever be yours.

Labels: broken, friends, friendship, heartbreak, heartbroken, help, love, poem, poetry

Thin wall of ice,
protecting me like a mother's womb.
Crystal clear, cold but nice,
this place shall be my tomb.

Not as fragile as it seems,
this ice wall,
it does not break, it does not bend,
it stands tall.

Everything is crystal clear,
the world looks the same in my eyes as to others.
Same reality, my dear,
but the differences...no one would bother. 

Is there any escape?

But again...why would I run? This is my sanctuary.

The world that I see disgusts me. 
Plague, corruption, injustice.
I'm safe in my sanctuary.
Free from any sickness, free from getting hurt. 

Behind the ice wall, I still see everything.
But I can't feel anything.

In this disgusting world, I see romance.
I see passion.
I see people getting hurt.
I see people hurting by the name of passion. 

...But why? And how?

Why do people choose to be hurt to feel passion?
Why do people choose to leave their sanctuary?
Inside my ice wall, I think.
Outside this wall, people feel.

No tears can be shed here.
No heart beating can be felt here.
No passion can be shared here.

I don't want to shed any tears,
I can't break my sanctuary, my safe haven.
Trapped inside for so many years,
I began to wonder, have I ever lived outside this haven?

Only warmth can set me free,
teach me passion, teach me romance,
grab my hand and tell me it will be okay,
Will you do it for me?

Labels: broken, heartbreak, heartbroken, hurt, ice, original, passion, poem, poetry, romance, sad