Well guys, I just realised how I tend to write a blogpost at midnight. Even I don't understand why. I have a lot going on in my head and I just need a place to let it out. I probably should begin this post by saying that BRISBANE IS SO HOT FOR THE LAST FEW DAYS. Again, if you personally know me, you'll know that I'm a polar bear. I'd die in heat. "But you've spent your life in Jakarta, which is one of the hottest city in the world?" some people may ask. No no no, in Jakarta, we travel by cars to indoor, air-conditioned places. We don't experience the heat. This is Brisbane, where I walk anywhere - even if I commute by bus, I still have to face the heat on my way to the bus stop - and not all places are air-conditioned. Brisbane's summer also has this dry feeling, which sometimes makes me suffocated. No, I'm not exaggerating. One random fact: I always have nosebleeds if the weather gets too hot.

Since university terms just started, I have to walk under the Brisbane sun almost everyday, during the peak when the sun is at its hottest. Everyday I would go home and just blast on the air-condition, which was a bad idea. Now I'm very sick, even lifting my head feels like lifting a sumo wrestler. I've had a couple of different medicines, it should work tomorrow. Anyways, I just completed my first week in uni. I was pretty pleased with my awesome schedule, but I was pretty worried about the courses this semester. You see, I'm in the Bachelor of Arts program, and just recently, the school of psychology has this tendency to switch the courses' offerings. There are some courses (mostly advanced courses) that are only offered in one semester, either the 1st or 2nd semester, and they sometimes switch it without any announcement. For local students, that may not be that big of a deal, but to us international students, YES, it is a HUGE thing. I still have another 3 semesters here, however, I really need to be careful in taking the classes, or else I'll have to stay here for another 6 months just to get that particular course, which would be annoying because I could've graduate and find a job or continue getting my Master's degree. 

To discuss about this issue, our student advisor asked us to meet her today, but as I was very sick, I couldn't leave the house and just asked my housemates afterwards. From our discussion, I decided to drop one course (PSYC2050 aka Learning and Cognition) and take it next semester, and add another course that probably would not be offered next year in semester 1 - which would hopefully be my last semester here - which is PSYC3202 aka Industrial Organisational Psychology. I didn't attend the first lecture of PSYC3202 this week so I'll need to catch up soon. As you can probably see now, I'm very serious about my future career (can you see it? Really? Probably not. Oh well...) and I'm also scared of marriage. It's not that I'm scared of commitment, I just fear the thought of getting married. Especially when it comes to the thought of having kids. I've never liked kids in particular, how could I ever have one?? 

Could someone please tell me, is it wrong to choose myself and my career over the one I love? I really don't want to waste my dad's money just to get a degree here and work in Indonesia. I like it overseas. I love living with people from different cultures from around the world. If I have to choose love, this option might be obsolete. Anyways, I've been in a long-distance, long-term relationship, which I just ended today because for days I've been thinking about my career and how this relationship affects my choice in deciding my education and career path. The thing is, this relationship doesn't affect my choice in a good way. To be truthful, I felt really burdened. I felt that every time I decide to do something with my education, I have to think of this relationship and what it will be. So finally I decided to choose my education over my love. It was hard, and I still couldn't stop crying, but I thought it would be best.

I just want to say to you - yes, I know you'll still read my blog posts - that I might've just made the worst mistake in my life, but even if I did, I just want you to prove me wrong and I wish us all the best. Sorry for the depressing post, I really just had to get this out of my chest.

So again, a little random fact about me : I LOVE EVERYTHING EPIC. Yes I do. Even my utmost favourite band in history is EPICA (they're incredibly awesome, but rather underrated. Please check them out! The vocalist, Simone Simons, is probably the most beautiful woman in the whole world. And they write the most epic songs with the most epic lyrics about life and justice. So much better than those mainstream pop crap). So you can see, ever since I was very young, I've always been a huge fan of the fantasy genre and this applies to books, movies, games, etc. In my previous post I mentioned that I've always been a rocker, but now that I'm growing up, another music genre that I grew to love is epic music. If you've ever noticed the background songs in trailers for movies (the epic ones, my favourite ones are from Pirates of the Caribbean, Lord of the Rings, and Inception) or even games (like Skyrim and Lineage II), now that's the kind of music I've been in love lately. These songs mostly are performed by the whole orchestra with full choir, sometimes singing in languages I don't even know - but that's the most fun part of it. 

Anyways, since I love everything EPIC, my dreams tend to be epic as well. I once dreamed that the purgatory is actually a "test" to see if you're good enough to escape hell. If you can manage to escape then you'll be sent to heaven, but if you can't, then you're stuck in hell. I had to fight incredibly huge monsters (the only one I could remember was a mix between a bear and a large dog, it was standing on its two feet but with a face shaped like a dog, and as big as a bear), had to outsmart the devil's minions who cleverly made a sort of genocide (making everyone trapped in hell, but me), and lots of other things unimaginable. The last thing I remember before I woke up was facing the devil himself. He said that I have accomplished all the tests, and I shall be free from the grips of hell forever. When I woke up I actually felt really good! 

Now, that dream was so old, let's talk about a dream that's more recent. It just occurred last night. So this dream was a mix between Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, and Alice in Wonderland. Epic, I know. Like in the beginning of Lord of the Rings, I had to meet several other people and together we formed a sort of fellowship in a mission to seek noble things that could help with justice and world peace. I know this sounds weird already, but trust me, it's going to get even better. I still can't remember who these people were, and I'm certain that I've never seen them before, not in real life, not in movies as well. Anyways, there were like 5 of us including me - there was another girl and 3 guys. Together, we had to travel using this long necklace made of chains (hint: Hermione's time-turner, anyone?) that could teleport us to this other dimension to find the lost item.