Posted Friday, 29 March 2013 // by Virenne
Long hair, loves or has tattoos, and cooking ability.I wanted a man like that, all my life.
I found him.
I didn't fall for him.
Everyone has their own preference.
I did.
I gave up on mine.
I didn't fall for him.
Now I can't imagine myself with anyone.
Any guy.
Any kind of person.
Who will I end up with?
Will I love him?
Will he love me back?
Will we spend the rest of our lives together?
Will I ever meet him?
In my dreams, I know who I want.
When I woke up, I don't want anyone.
I met someone in my dreams.
He was special.
Every minute of waking up felt like another world for me.
I spend my day wanting to go back to my dreams.
Because I know in my dreams, he's there.
Reaching out his hands for me.
I live my life in my dreams.
I dream more than I wake.
In the infinite world in my dreams, we're together.
We found each other.
I'm certain about my dreams.
Not so certain about my real world.
How long will I have to live this way?
Labels: broken, dream, dreams, heartbreak, heartbroken, him, love, poem, poetry, reality
Posted Wednesday, 13 June 2012 // by Virenne
I'm pretty sure I had. Anyways, I have my excuse for not updating this blog so frequently - I'm studying for exams and by all means, if I don't update this blog, then that means I'm really studying...for real. I think this will be the first time I update my blog during the day, I don't know what happened to me, okay! Let's just say I want to get some of my dreams out of my head so I can start focusing on studying again.Now referring back to the title of this post, I'm pretty sure I've told you some of my weird and absurd dreams that I could remember. I want to tell you guys about this dream I had around 2 or 3 nights ago. I've been sleeping at 5 am and I think that kind of ruined my circadian clock and my dreams as well, they got even more and more absurd. The one dream that I want to tell you is about me getting married. Not absurd enough? Fair enough.
Let me tell you one thing about me - I'm terrified by marriages.
No, I'm not afraid of commitment or long-term relationship, I'm just afraid of marriages, at least right now. I'm still 20, I'm still young (that's what I'd like to think lol), and I honestly don't understand why some of my friends already got married at this age, like around 20 or 21 years old. There's nothing wrong with it, of course, it's just not for me, I suppose. I'm pretty sure I'll get married someday, but I'd love to wait about 6 or 8 years until then. I'm not a big fan of attending weddings anyway. So this dream REALLY freaked me out.
The thing was, I got married in BRISBANE (because I remember the surroundings were more like Brisbane than Jakarta) to this guy that I could not even remember his name or his face, all I know is that he was pretty tall and he had dark hair. I wasn't even sure if he was Indonesian. All of my friends were there at the wedding, there was also a wedding after party at my friend's house, which turned out to be HUGE. The thing was, even though all of my friends were there, my parents were nowhere to be seen. More like scary than freaky. And then there was one of my lecturers back in University of Indonesia who showed up and she turned out to be my husband's ex-girlfriend and she sort of confronted me, saying that she detested our wedding. Awkward.
It may sound like a pretty normal dream, but trust me, it was more absurd and awkward to me than you can imagine. I know it was just a dream, but still, I have this slight fear that it was going to happen for real. Who knows?
My other dream last night was so...absurd I couldn't even comprehend what was going on. I was hanging out at this photography studio throughout the dream, with this one girl (supposedly I remember her, but now I completely forgot about her...I think she is one of my friends...), one guy who was the owner of the studio and the photographer (he had this huge tattoo on one of his arms), which I had no idea who he was, and another guy who worked at the studio, I also didn't recognise him. What happened next in the studio was rated 18+ so I'll just keep it to myself, but then this girl and I went to pick up something in that studio and we end up finding a HUGE dungeon underneath with this orange-reddish-coloured dragon.
Say whattttttt.....???
What a weird and crappy ending. Pshh. Anyways, I just wanted to spill this out of my head so I can concentrate on studying. Wish me luck with my exams, guys! :)
Labels: absurd, dreams, exam, marriage, photography, studio, wedding, weird
Posted Thursday, 1 March 2012 // by Virenne
So again, a little random fact about me : I LOVE EVERYTHING EPIC. Yes I do. Even my utmost favourite band in history is EPICA (they're incredibly awesome, but rather underrated. Please check them out! The vocalist, Simone Simons, is probably the most beautiful woman in the whole world. And they write the most epic songs with the most epic lyrics about life and justice. So much better than those mainstream pop crap). So you can see, ever since I was very young, I've always been a huge fan of the fantasy genre and this applies to books, movies, games, etc. In my previous post I mentioned that I've always been a rocker, but now that I'm growing up, another music genre that I grew to love is epic music. If you've ever noticed the background songs in trailers for movies (the epic ones, my favourite ones are from Pirates of the Caribbean, Lord of the Rings, and Inception) or even games (like Skyrim and Lineage II), now that's the kind of music I've been in love lately. These songs mostly are performed by the whole orchestra with full choir, sometimes singing in languages I don't even know - but that's the most fun part of it.
Anyways, since I love everything EPIC, my dreams tend to be epic as well. I once dreamed that the purgatory is actually a "test" to see if you're good enough to escape hell. If you can manage to escape then you'll be sent to heaven, but if you can't, then you're stuck in hell. I had to fight incredibly huge monsters (the only one I could remember was a mix between a bear and a large dog, it was standing on its two feet but with a face shaped like a dog, and as big as a bear), had to outsmart the devil's minions who cleverly made a sort of genocide (making everyone trapped in hell, but me), and lots of other things unimaginable. The last thing I remember before I woke up was facing the devil himself. He said that I have accomplished all the tests, and I shall be free from the grips of hell forever. When I woke up I actually felt really good!
Now, that dream was so old, let's talk about a dream that's more recent. It just occurred last night. So this dream was a mix between Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, and Alice in Wonderland. Epic, I know. Like in the beginning of Lord of the Rings, I had to meet several other people and together we formed a sort of fellowship in a mission to seek noble things that could help with justice and world peace. I know this sounds weird already, but trust me, it's going to get even better. I still can't remember who these people were, and I'm certain that I've never seen them before, not in real life, not in movies as well. Anyways, there were like 5 of us including me - there was another girl and 3 guys. Together, we had to travel using this long necklace made of chains (hint: Hermione's time-turner, anyone?) that could teleport us to this other dimension to find the lost item.
The thing about this other dimension is that the form changes every time we go there. However, no matter how different the set up of the land, we always have to go to the Lake of Goodwill (yes, it even has a name). This lake keeps all the necessary things needed to keep the world balanced, so every time the world starts to favour a side from another, that's when we have to go to the lake. The things inside the lake can be in any form, from a blood red rock to a shining crown. There's a catch - I was the only one who could get into the lake to actually get the thing needed. (Insert Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone reference here) Remember the Mirror of Erised? Now imagine a same thing, but instead of a mirror, it's actually a lake (hence, the name: Lake of Goodwill).
It just so happens to be that I was the only who could go into the lake because other people who tried to go in (maybe they don't have enough goodwill), they will get suffocated and poisoned by the water, but when I jump into the lake, it turns crystal clear and gleaming with light. The lake itself was pretty huge, but rather than that it was DEEP. I mean, really deep. (Insert another Harry Potter reference here) In the Triwizard Tournament when Harry had to jump into the lake and save Ron, the lake was deep and filled with a lot of creatures. They didn't attack me though, they only watched me carefully as I swum and searched for the item.
I swear, if I told this story to Sigmund Freud, he would say that to reach my goal in life (that can make people happy), I would need to move instead of staying in my hometown, and I will need my trusted fellows to get to it. I would also need to keep a good heart and good intentions. There will be some other people that would supervise me and watch me closely, but I don't harm them, they wouldn't attack me. Something like that. Without the interpretation, I still liked the dream anyways. Anyways, I better go to sleep now, it's just past midnight. I will see you guys and I will report the full experience of my first week in my second semester in UQ!
Cheers!
Labels: absurd, alice in wonderland, analysis, books, dream, dreams, epic, epica, freud, games, harry potter, lord of the rings, psychology, songs, thriller